Dear SPD, You are my bitch now.

Dear SPD, (Sensory Processing Disorder)
 Today you were WAY out of line. At my WORK? You showed up at my workplace and made me cry in front of my BOSS. MY FUCKING BOSS.

 This is it. You no longer have the right to think you have me like that. Oh, no, you don't.

 And for those times you made me be so irritated and distracted at the sounds around me instead of focusing on what I needed to do, and then my crazy hateful reaction I gave to the innocent people around me made people mad at me. Guess what? That weight is yours to carry now. You won't be hindering me anymore. 

Those times people around me just thought I was a bitch, that was your fault too. I won't take responsibility for that.

I know how to handle and control my self. It's your stupid and irrational affect you crash on my emotions that make me feel weak. But I am not accepting you in my brain anymore. You cannot and are not allowed to make me feel weak, anymore. I am now going to banish you from that place. You are not a key holder there anymore.

 And I am going to take some primal rage out on your ass, right now, if you think about sticking around. You'd better hope you run as far away from me as possible, because if you darken my door again, your ass. is. mine.

 I will cut you.

 I will make Charlie Manson look like someone who collects pound puppies and has heart pajamas.

 You know what the worst part about you is? That you aren't wanted. And yet you show up.
And without calling first.

 You are an annoying pest.

 You are a shitty friend, I'll tell you that! You spread chaos and misery where ever your heart beats.

 So from now on, if you show up and think you are going to ruin my day, you'd better pack a lunch, fucker. Because I'll take you down everytime. I know that you think you can try, but next time, bitch, you'd better bet your nasty ass that I won't be the one crying.

 Eat shit and die,
Jamie

 For those of you who want to know what Misophonia, a part of the Sensory bitchface punk I just told where to shove it, feels like, please watch these videos. XoXo :)

  and

Understanding Inspiration

What's inspiring me today: "Wild Mountain Honey" - Steve Miller Band 

Lyrics | Steve Miller lyrics - Wild Mountain Honey lyrics - Wild Mountain Honey lyrics

 Come on mama
 Heal this lonesome man
 Grow the tree of wholeness
 In this desert land

Experiencing God's peace and embracing it 
Feeling flowy and free 
Excited about going on an afternoon date with my love 

 Inspiration is a tricky thing. 
It, as all things do in the universe, has a vibration and balance. 

Most people think of Inspiration as a light and airy thing. 
Something dreamers talk about. 
Their heads stuck in the clouds and just trying to cruise through life unaware of the dangers. 

But sometimes, Inspiration has a darker tone. And sometimes we don't realize how dangerous inspiration can be. 

 I am said dreamer above. Sometimes I try to just set my cruise and forget to look at the details around me that allude me until I come crashing into them as they have collected and built a wall. 

I am learning to realize this and have decided instead of holding onto the anger that INSPIRES those things to collect around me, I should turn the negative to a positive charge in my own life. 

 I am able to be expressive through art, music, and writing. It's my outlet. My soul-portal. It is the flame to my wick. The oil to my burner. The lamp unto my feet and light upon my path, as it brings me closer to my spirit self. My spirit self that feels the closest to God and being his servant through being fruitful in my works. 

Fruitful in the sense of pure love, giving myself away to the inspiration that God the divine sends to me. I will be fruitful in the inspirations he allows me. I will try to inspire others from the inspirations He allows, because I want to share the love and give away some of my own experiences with His love with a grateful heart. 

 This collection of writings and art is a project I have had in mind for years. It is parts allusion, illusion, metaphorical free thinking and pure inspiration. A dive into my own journey of guiding my spirit to allowing God to mold me into the human being he designed me to be. 

This collection I am sharing with people who are interested and open minded about allowing me to reach out to them in my own inspirations, whether light and airy and writing about joys and blessings, or through alluding to my inner depths through art to allow my soul to release the negative. 

I am hoping to help someone in the same pace as helping my self to unlock the inner purposes of my soul. Some days I will write to myself. Some days I will write to you. Some days I will write to God. Some days I will write to my feelings. Some days I will write to no one in particular. This is merely a practice or daily devotion I am observing to God for giving me positive inspiration on a daily basis. 

This is my journey in gratefulness and trust of the Holy Spirit. And learning the role the Holy Spirit plays in my life. 

 Welcome to my head. It's weird in here. 
Just fair warning.